Fortunately, I have a lot of friends who aren't actors. They give me a nice perspective, and that helps to keep my grounded. They will ask questions about how auditions went, how casting works, etc. But, invariably, they will all say the same thing:
Friend: "Man, I don't know how you do it."
Me: "Do what?"
Friend: "Deal with being rejected so much."
Me: "Eh. You get used to it."
You do. You get used to it. If you are booking one job out of every 10 auditions you go on, you are doing very, very well. So, in order to deal with that ratio, you have to deal with not getting what you want. And in a town of 100,000 actors, you more often don't get what you want more often than not.
I used to be very superstitious about the auditions I go on. I would be cryptic with my co-workers about auditions, and not talk about them. My twisted take on magical thinking was if I didn't talk about a possible big audition (like, 10 years ago, I auditioned for The Goodman Theater's production of Death of a Salesman with Brian Denehy), I'd keep the energy contained and that would increase the possibility of me landing the job. Weird voodoo stuff like that. Eventually, I got over it. An actor's real job is to audition well; everything else after that is gravy. You have to deliver once you get a job, but you have the get the damn job first. And even after you get every job, that doesn't mean that your work will always be seen. Kevin Costner was cut out of most of The Big Chill, except for when he was a corpse. Lara Flynn Boyle's first big job was Ferris Bueller's Day Off, and she ended up on the cutting room floor. Do you remember Sigourney Weaver from Annie Hall? She's Alvy's date at the end of the film -- all you see of her is a blur in a wide shot.
So, along those lines, my latest news. I got cut out of the commercial (the official term is "Outgraded"). I got the official word on Valentine's Day. Romantic! Obviously, I'm quite disappointed. But, here's the thing: I got well compensated for my 2 days of work, so that's good. Also, my being cut from the commercial had nothing to do with my talent, my work, or my work ethic. It just happened that way. And this stuff happens often.
Quite often when it comes to acting and being up for roles, you lose out due to reasons that have nothing to do with you. I've lost roles because I was too tall, too young, too old, not pale enough, and for one Pepsi commercial, not Dave Chappelle. So, I'm used to not getting roles for stuff I have no control over. So, being cut out of a commercial is a bummer, but I'm not going to beat myself up for it. It happens. Onto the next one...
:( i'm sorry, still.
Posted by: katied | February 19, 2008 at 04:23 AM
Thanks!
Posted by: Jon | February 19, 2008 at 09:29 AM