Insert Title Here

I went to my pharmacy to pick up my Flonase refill the other day and I ended up sharing an elevator with Ms. Jo Anne Worley. How random is that?

Things are... all right, I guess. I haven't had an audition in about a month, and that's making me pretty antsy. Urban Basic Cable Competition Show is going well, and starting to wind down. This second season debuts in the middle of next month, so keep your eyes peeled. I've really busted my butt this season -- I've scripted acts on all four of the episodes I've worked on and scripted 15 packages for the show's web presence as well. Since I've gone above and beyond the call of duty, I asked for a bump in my title. For the uninitatied, job titles in reality television simultaneously have no meaning and yet carry a ton of weight. Titles like Assistant Story Editor (my current credit), Associate Story Producer, Co-Producer, and the like are rather interchangable, and therefore rather dull what each one means. In other portions of the industry, one's title comes with an exact definition of duties and rank. For example, if you're a Co-Producer on an hour long drama, it means that not only are you one of the writers on the show, you're higher up on the food chain than a Staff Writer but not as high up as a Supervising Producer. Being an Assistant Story Editor on a reality show can mean a variety of things when it comes to your duties. On some shows, you do more administrative duties to help out the Story department (as I did at THE BACHELOR). On others, you are actively scripting acts with Story Editors for your assigned episodes (as I'm doing right now on Urban Basic Cable Competition Show). In some rare cases, an Assistant Story Editor is basically a glorified logger, just transcribing interviews and logging footage (as I did on Crappy Obscure Gender Channel Design Show). However, merely having 'Assistant Story Editor' on your resume automatically ticks you up in respect than having 'Logger'. It means you can start moving up to Story Editor, where (in most cases) you are actually scripting episodes, pitching story ideas and are actively involved in the creative side of putting a show together.

Now that's out of the way, back to the story. A few weeks ago, I filled in for my Story Editor when she was out of town on a much needed vacation. For a full week, I was in the edit bay with the show's top editor, working on one of our episodes. He really liked a lot of the stuff I was putting together, especially since he was about to go on his own vacation at the end of the week. So there I was, sitting in another edit bay, watching footage and frantically taking notes so I can script an entire act on my own, out of necessity, due to the time crunch. Combine all the extra work I was doing with me rising to this challenge, I felt like I had earned a bump in my title. I was (and currently *am*) doing more work than the rest of the Assistant Story Editors on the show, and felt that it was necessary. The head of the Story department was behind it, as the Supervising Producer, who said he would then ask the two showrunners about it. Well, a week went by and I inquired again, as I was leaving to go home Wednesday night. The Supervising Producer pulled me outside and broke the news to me: it's not going to happen.

SUPERVISING PRODUCER: We all really do appreciate all of the hard work you've been doing, and how into the show you are, but they [The Showrunners] passed on it.

ME: Okay.

SUPERVISING PRODUCER: [Production Company Show Runner] feels that it would ruffle too many feathers in the deparment this late in the game. He just wants to be fair.

ME: [looking down at my feet] Yeah, I understand.

SUPERVISING PRODUCER: You're pretty pissed, aren't you.

ME: [looking back up at him] No. I mean, I'm not happy about it, but I do understand.

He went on to say how maybe for next season, if I'm interested in returning, that this is definitely something we can discuss, etc. etc. As you can imagine, I was pretty annoyed and put out for a while. Only today do I really feel a lot better. At times, I was feeling exactly how I felt a little while ago. It's something I'm interested in, definitely. Then why aren't I more excited about this? Why am I not excited about much of anything anymore? (Well, besides Project Runway, of course.)

For most of my life, I've identified myself as an actor. It's what I've always wanted, it's how I've defined myself. But lately, my drive for it has really drained out of me. A year ago at this time, I was being full-time actor guy: doing a play, going out on auditions, actively pursuing acting leads, etc. I was broke, sure, but really happy. But now, I'm doing several of these things (minus the doing the play), and my enthusiasm has gotten very low. Maybe if I had more auditions lately that would help. It occurred to me the other day that maybe I need some regular reassurances to keep myself emotionally invested in things. I've had that with acting, even when I had a year-and-a-half dry spell. I would have auditions on a regular basis (lucky, I know). This recent emotional upheaval has really caused me to think: is this what I want anymore? I've been thinking more and more about doing more producing. I really enjoyed it when I was shooting the mockumentary -- maybe it was the combination of the producing and the acting, I don't know. What I know right now is that I'm dissatisfied with how things are with my life right now in re: my career.

One component of all this is that, well, the current market. I have a young face for my age, which is an asset and a drawback. The bulk of the new TV shows are either police procedurals or shows with military tinges to them ("24", "The Unit", "Kidnapped", "Vanished") and very few quirky comedies. There are some, but the number of comedies on the air has been dramatically reduced. And let's face it, there are a lot of roles I can play, but what I can be immediately cast in are comedies and quirky dramas, and there aren't a lot of those right now. I do feel that as the market changes back, hopefully it'll swing to my favor. Also, I may just have to wait things out in general. I have a young face for my age, which means that a lot of the roles for which I'm good I'm just look too young. I would be a kick ass assistant school principal, scientist, computer technician, persnickety uncle, touchy DA, etc. However, I'm going to have to wait out until my face catches up with those roles. My commercial teacher did a lot of commercials when she was in her 20's and 30's, but once she hit her 40's, she found herself out of work. Due to her cutesy look, there weren't a lot of roles open for her. She told me "Jon, once I hit my mid-60's, I'm going to be one really cute grandmother, and I'm going to work constantly. But right now, I teach. I'll wait it out." So, maybe that's what I need to do. Work in reality tv and wait everything out. I might not like it, but maybe that's what I'll do. What do you think?

Comments

[jbcollins - mom]

Jon---You need a vacation!
Hang in there. You have a lot of talent and what you do have is perserverance... that counts for a lot. You can do both - be a producer and an actor. Why stick to comedy... I think you would do well in drama.

In any case....chill out. love you

MOM

[katie d]

I agree with your mom, as I think you probably know. You need some time off, for sure. I've told you what else I think. Acting is a tough profession, and you seem to have perceived some stagnation in your life lately, so it's not surprising you're feeling kinda "meh" about it. It'll happen, though. You just gotta wait for it. I believe in you. xo

[katie d]

and also, i'm sorry the showrunners are dopes.