This coming Saturday is my 20th High School Reunion... and I'm not going. Mostly, the reason why we aren't going is timing. Neither Tom nor I get paid days off for our jobs and Tom is his entire department on his show. If he takes time off, there isn't anyone that can fill in for him while he's gone. Couple that expense of travel, lodging and the actual reunion, and well, that pretty much cements it.
High school for me was a very mixed bag. I had a good deal of friends and I did find a pretty good niche doing drama and Speech Team there. Coping with my sexuality at the time, however, was not easy for me. I didn't date in high school because I was scared I was going to be "found out". That and I just couldn't accept it yet. I also had the joy of having some of the jocks of the school calling me "faggot" as I walked to and from classes. So, high school was frought with tension. I had some wins (some nice character roles in plays, Speech Team medals and awards, some great friends) and some losses (never got a lead role in high school, nasty comments said my way, anger at myself and others, some nasty comments I said about others that I'm now definitely not proud of, lots and lots of angst). But I don't look back fondly.
Like a lot of people, I was still trying to find myself in high school and didn't really flourish until college. Because of this, I'll get nostalgic about college but not high school. Into my late 20's, I still kept a fantasy going about arriving at my 10 year high school reunion and showing off my (semi) successful self as an actor and being out and proud and show off my fantastic husband. But, that was not meant to be. I didn't get the information on my 10 year reunion until 2 weeks ahead of time... and I was moving that weekend. So instead of making the bullies who tormented me eat crow over overcooked chicken and watered-down drinks at some banquet hall in the Chicago area, I and a band of 10 people were shlepping boxes into Tom's and my new apartment in Los Angeles. And that's when I really let high school go. Let go of getting "revenge" for slights that happened decades ago, and letting go of the vicious gossip that I was as well.
Through the advent of Facebook, I'm now reconnected with a lot of friends of mine from high school I thought I'd never see again. I can drop them a line, say happy birthday, trade comments and some civilized debate over topics serious and trivial, and even Instant Message and catch up. Because of this, I don't really feel the need to fly back to the Chicago area this weekend, plop down $150 for Tom and I to go connect with people with whom I'm already connected. Sure, it would be fun to grab a drink and catch up, but I know that we can at least do that virtually at any time. Also, on a practical level, my closest friends from high school are a year younger than me so they wouldn't even be there anyway.
However, there is one big reason why Tom and I aren't going to my reunion. See, we aren't going to be coming into town this weekend 'cause we're going to be in Chicago the weekend before Thanksgiving. Why? My ultra-talented husband is a finalist in the 2010 Great Gay Screenplay Contest, and they are doing a staged reading of his script Detassling. With our schedules being rather tight, you can see why I would chose this weekend to come in instead of my reunion.
If any of my high school friends (or any other friends I've made since high school) want to do a mini-reunion that weekend and support my awesome husband, you can get the information on the readings here and the tickets here. Getting together for this reason is the best excuse for a reunion that I can think of.
Awww Jon! You know, I think we went to prom together senior year.. or maybe King of Hearts? But I'll admit, I was clueless about sexual orientation in high school and it never occurred to me that you were gay- I just knew something was "different" about the way you & I clicked. And that difference never bothered me. I am so sorry you had a negative high school experience and I wish I'd known so I could've stood up for you to those asses.
Posted by: Georgette Oden | January 14, 2011 at 11:27 PM
It was homecoming, and you are so sweet! It's great to know that I have a great friend like you in my corner. We definitely need to get together and hang out at some point, the next time we're in the same city. Thanks!
Posted by: JeezJon | January 15, 2011 at 12:41 PM